Archiv der Kategorie: IANA SALENKO

Gespräche mit einer Prima Ballerina.

THE LITTLE WILLIAM IS THERE (2)

YOU CAN GO HOME AGAIN

„Mami, it’s happening. Can you come right now?“ Marian asked his mother excitedly on the phone.

„But I have my sport tonight. I can’t do that.“ she said to her son. But this was only her initial reaction. Although Sylvia had her own life and enjoyed pursuing her own activities, she supported her family wholeheartedly.

She helped wherever she could and she loved Marley beyond measure. So it was without question that she would drop everything to be with her grandson when Marian and Iana had other responsibilities. So in this situation, she canceled her plans and went to Marian and Iana’s home immediately.

During the phone call with his mother, Marian paced nervously back and forth on the terrace. He didn’t know if he and Iana would need to spend the night in the hospital, or if they could go home again, so his mother’s initial reluctance to come and help them, made him even more nervous.

„Mami.“ Marian tried again. But he did not have to say anything more.

„It’s alright, I’ll be right there.“ his mother soothed him.
After talking to his mother, Marian went to find Iana in the bathroom. While everyone around her was in chaos, she herself, was calm.

She was standing in front of the mirror with curlers in her hair. She looked happy because finally it was happening. The wait was over.
Again, a little amniotic fluid leaked from her. Marian became even more restless.

„We need to go to the hospital.“ he urged.
They arrived at the hospital shortly before half past eight in the evening. The midwife initially examined Iana for her general condition, and then attached her to the ‚labor clerk‘.

Iana had been physically and mentally prepared for what she expected when the child came.

„I feel like I’m going to training,“ she joked.
The midwife came back in. „Your uterine mouth is still closed.“ she told Iana, looking friendly.

„So you can go home for now.“ she added.
Iana looked at the midwife questioningly and at the same time doubtfully.

She sensed that it was not good to leave the hospital again, only to have to come back a little later.

It was quiet in the room. Nothing would have suggested how strained Iana was now. From her experience, she sensed that it did not feel right to follow the midwife’s advice.

Marian looked questioningly at Iana.
After a short break she said:

„For the birth of Marley, at first it looked like he was not ready to come out yet. But then everything suddenly went very fast.“

The midwife looked at Iana. She didn’t seem too happy that Iana had doubted her advice. But Iana knew her own condition, she knew her body, and she knew she was feeling the beginning of childbirth. She conveyed this to the midwife, who understood.

„I’ll discuss that with the doctor.“ she said, turning to the door.
Iana paced up and down and Marian was silent. The tension was noticeable to both.

They had been sent to the waiting area directly in front of the delivery room. They were waiting on the doctor to give them final certainty that it was actually amniotic fluid that had leaked out.
Finally, it was time. Iana was re-examined. Now, Iana could not sit still. She began to breathe shorter, she got cramps and the contractions began.

„That’s pain to enjoy. “ she joked with Marian. He smiled back, looking calm on the outside, but Iana knew her husband. She knew how excited he was inside.

„I feel like the baby is kicking.“ Iana told the doctor. She looked over at her and smiled as she looked at the ultrasound image, which showed that Iana’s cervix was about to open.

„We’ll keep you here.“ she said to Iana, after a second vote with the midwife.

Right after the examination, they were given a twin room, set up so that Marian could stay there too. He lay down next to Iana in the double bed and tried to reassure her. Iana had to smile, she could feel his uneasiness. Marian played some music on his phone to help them both relax.

„Can you give me a glass of water, please.“ Iana asked Marian. „And the lip balm.“

The contractions became stronger and stronger. To make it more bearable for Iana, the midwife gave her a light analgesic.

GESPRÄCHE MIT EINER PRIMA BALLERINA

A VERY NORMAL DAY BEGINS

Monday, May 13, 2019.
Iana’s pregnancy was coming to an end, but she was feeling fine. Her stomach was growing and it felt very hard but this didn’t bother her at all.

„I’m going to training today.“ she called to Marian, who was coming down the stairs and heading to the kitchen.

„Hm,“ he grunted, „he was not capable of anything more at that time of day. The day had just begun and Marians‘ batteries had not yet started up.“

„I want to move, not just sit here.“ Iana told him, while Marian was busy in the kitchen.

„But won’t it be too much for you? The contractions can start at anytime.“ Marian replied, looking at Iana’s stomach.

„Oh, it’s alright.“ she replied. Though she was constantly wondering when it was finally going to be time to give birth. Iana, Marian and Marley, could hardly wait for little William to finally arrive.

After training Iana still felt good and later in the afternoon, she even felt like sweeping the terrace. For some reason, she couldn’t let herself rest. She wanted to clean everything in the house.

„I can help you.“ she told Marian as he plucked weeds. She jumped up and grabbed the broom.
Afterwards she accompanied her son Marley to piano lessons together with Marian.

After piano lessons, they all went to a fast food restaurant together.

„I want to drink Cola.“ Marley said as they all sat down. „You know, that not only makes you fat but after you drink it you can not sleep all night.“ Marian warned his son.

Marley was just ten years old and a very bright boy for his age. „That doesn’t matter, I can stay awake and make videos telling my stories.“ he responded quickly.

„Think of Mr. Müller and his big belly. Do you want to look like that? „Marian joked.

„Papa, then I would have to drink whole truckloads of Cola.“ Everyone at the table was smiling.

„I want to try a Cola too.“ Iana said suddenly.

„Hopefully it will be good for you in your condition.“ Marian said.
„Yes, it will be fine.“ Iana replied, dipping a french fry into the spicy sauce.

It was nice to sit in the restaurant, to laugh and enjoy the three of them being together. Soon, there would be four, and quietly, little William was already sitting at the table.

Iana felt good after the meal. Hopefully the food and lightheartedness would help to start her labour.

„Mama, do you want to play Lego?“ Marley asked his mother when they arrived back home.

Iana agreed and Marley got the blocks out.
Meanwhile, Marian mowed the lawn in the garden.

Suddenly, Iana noticed that she was losing water.
Could this be the beginning of labour?

For a week, Iana had tried everything, but the contractions did not materialize, nothing happened. Could the Cola and spicy sauce have been the triggers?

„Marley, I think it’s starting.“ Iana shouted.

„No, no, please, not today!“

Marley looked at his mother. His face expressed panic.
He was worried about his mother, but he was also thinking about himself.

The next day he had a bycicle test and he really wanted to go. Also, he didn’t want his brother to be born on the 13th because that brings bad luck. Marley was desperate and at a loss.

Iana felt the amniotic fluid running out of her.

„I’ll go take a bath and then apply a little make-up.“ she said, seeming calm and balanced as everything around her became hectic.

 

Link to the english version: https://uwemuellererzaehlt.de/2019/08/28/the-little-william-is-here-1/

Montag, 13. Mai 2019. Iana ging es gut, und das obwohl sich scheinbar die Zeit ihrer Schwangerschaft dem Ende zuneigte. Ihr Bauch war immer weiter gewachsen und jetzt fühlte er sich sehr hart an. Doch sie fand das nicht schlimm.

„Ich gehe heute zum Training“, rief sie Marian zu, der gerade die Treppe herunterkam und auf die Küche zusteuerte.
„Hm“, brummte der. Zu mehr war er zu der Tageszeit noch nicht fähig. Der Tag hatte ja gerade angefangen und Marians ‚Batterien waren noch nicht hochgefahren‘.

„Ich will mich bewegen, nicht nur hier herumsitzen“, sagte Iana zu ihm, während Marian in der Küche hantierte.
„Aber wird das nicht zu viel für dich? Es kann jeden Augenblick losgehen, mit den Wehen“, antwortete Marian und schaute auf Ianas Bauch.

„Ach, das geht schon“, entgegnete sie. Dabei stellte sie sich gerade in den letzten Tagen immer wieder die Frage, wann es nun endlich soweit war, und es losging mit der Geburt. Iana, Marian, Marley, sie alle konnten es kaum noch erwarten, dass der kleine William auf die Welt kam.

Nach dem Training fühlte sich Iana immer noch gut.
Später, es war bereits nachmittags, da verspürte sie Lust, die Terrasse zu fegen. Irgendwas ließ sie nicht zur Ruhe kommen. Sie wollte putzen, alles im Haus saubermachen.

„Ich kann dir helfen“, sagte sie zu Marian, während der Unkraut zupfte. Sie sprang auf und griff sich den Besen.
Anschließend begleitete sie noch gemeinsam mit Marian ihren Sohn Marley zum Klavierunterricht.

Nach dem Klavierunterricht gingen sie alle zusammen in ein Fastfood-Restaurant.
„Ich möchte Cola trinken“, rief Marley gleich, als sie sich alle hingesetzt hatten.

„Du weißt schon, dass das nicht nur dick macht und du außerdem die ganze Nacht nicht schlafen kannst“, mahnte Marian seinen Sohn.
Marley war gerade mal zehn Jahre alt und für sein Alter ein sehr aufgewecktes Kerlchen, und nicht auf den Mund gefallen.

„Macht nichts, dann kann ich nachts weiter meine Geschichten per Video erzählen“, entgegnete er schlagfertig.

„Denk an Herrn Müller und seinen dicken Bauch. Willst du auch mal so aussehen?“, scherzte Marian.

„Papa, dann müsste ich ja ganze Lastzüge voller Cola leer trinken und zu Weihnachten könnte dann nicht wie gewohnt ein festlich geschmückter Coca-Cola – Zug zu den Kindern fahren, so wie jedes Jahr.“

Alle schmunzelten am Tisch.
„Ich will auch eine Cola probieren“, sagte Iana plötzlich.
„Hoffentlich bekommt sie dir in deinem Zustand“, meinte nun Marian.

„Ja, das geht schon“, antwortete Iana und tunkte eine Pommes frites in die scharfe Sauce.
Es war schön, im Restaurant zu sitzen, zu lachen und die Gemeinsamkeit zu dritt zu genießen.
Bald würden sie zu viert sein, und im Stillen saß der kleine William bereits mit am Tisch.

Iana fühlte sich gut nach dem Essen. Und doch sollte diese Leichtfertigkeit beim Essen mit ihre Geburtswehen beschleunigen.
„Mama, wollen wir Lego spielen?“, fragte Marley seine Mutter, als sie wieder Zuhause angekommen waren.

Iana war einverstanden und Marley holte die Steine raus.
Marian mähte indessen im Garten den Rasen.
Plötzlich bemerkte Iana, dass bei ihr Wasser austrat.

Sollte das der Beginn der Geburtswehen sein?
Eine Woche lang hatte Iana alles versucht, aber die Wehen setzten nicht ein, es passierte nichts.

Und die Cola und die scharfe Sauce, waren sie jetzt der Auslöser für all das?

„Marley, ich glaub‘, es geht los“, rief Iana.
„Nein, nein, bitte nicht, noch nicht heute!“

Marley schaute seine Mutter an. Sein Gesicht drückte Panik aus.
Er hatte Angst um seine Mutter. Aber er dachte auch daran, dass am nächsten Tag die Fahrradprüfung für ihn anstand, und die wollte er unbedingt ablegen.

Außerdem: Sein Bruder sollte nicht an einem 13. geboren werden. Das würde doch Unglück nach sich ziehen. Marley war verzweifelt und ratlos.

Iana spürte das aus ihr herauslaufende Fruchtwasser.
„Ich geh‘ in die Badewanne und danach ein wenig Make-up auftragen“, sagte sie. Sie schien ruhig und ausgeglichen, während um sie herum alles hektisch wurde.

 

THE LITTLE WILLIAM IS HERE (1)

A VERY NORMAL DAY BEGINS

Monday, May 13, 2019.
Iana’s pregnancy was coming to an end, but she was feeling fine. Her stomach was growing and it felt very hard but this didn’t bother her at all.

„I’m going to training today.“ she called to Marian, who was coming down the stairs and heading to the kitchen.

„Hm,“ he grunted, „he was not capable of anything more at that time of day. The day had just begun and Marians‘ batteries had not yet started up.“

„I want to move, not just sit here.“ Iana told him, while Marian was busy in the kitchen.

„But won’t it be too much for you? The contractions can start at anytime.“ Marian replied, looking at Iana’s stomach.

„Oh, it’s alright.“ she replied. Though she was constantly wondering when it was finally going to be time to give birth. Iana, Marian and Marley, could hardly wait for little William to finally arrive.

After training Iana still felt good and later in the afternoon, she even felt like sweeping the terrace. For some reason, she couldn’t let herself rest. She wanted to clean everything in the house.

„I can help you.“ she told Marian as he plucked weeds. She jumped up and grabbed the broom.
Afterwards she accompanied her son Marley to piano lessons together with Marian.

After piano lessons, they all went to a fast food restaurant together.

„I want to drink Cola.“ Marley said as they all sat down. „You know, that not only makes you fat but after you drink it you can not sleep all night.“ Marian warned his son.

Marley was just ten years old and a very bright boy for his age. „That doesn’t matter, I can stay awake and make videos telling my stories.“ he responded quickly.

„Think of Mr. Müller and his big belly. Do you want to look like that? „Marian joked.

„Papa, then I would have to drink whole truckloads of Cola.“ Everyone at the table was smiling.

„I want to try a Cola too.“ Iana said suddenly.

„Hopefully it will be good for you in your condition.“ Marian said.
„Yes, it will be fine.“ Iana replied, dipping a french fry into the spicy sauce.

It was nice to sit in the restaurant, to laugh and enjoy the three of them being together. Soon, there would be four, and quietly, little William was already sitting at the table.

Iana felt good after the meal. Hopefully the food and lightheartedness would help to start her labour.

„Mama, do you want to play Lego?“ Marley asked his mother when they arrived back home.

Iana agreed and Marley got the blocks out.
Meanwhile, Marian mowed the lawn in the garden.

Suddenly, Iana noticed that she was losing water.
Could this be the beginning of labour?

For a week, Iana had tried everything, but the contractions did not materialize, nothing happened. Could the Cola and spicy sauce have been the triggers?

„Marley, I think it’s starting.“ Iana shouted.

„No, no, please, not today!“

Marley looked at his mother. His face expressed panic.
He was worried about his mother, but he was also thinking about himself.

The next day he had a bycicle test and he really wanted to go. Also, he didn’t want his brother to be born on the 13th because that brings bad luck. Marley was desperate and at a loss.

Iana felt the amniotic fluid running out of her.

„I’ll go take a bath and then apply a little make-up.“ she said, seeming calm and balanced as everything around her became hectic.

 

CONVERSATIONS WITH A PRIMA BALLERINA

INTERVIEW WITH IANA SALENKO AND MARIAN WALTER ON MAY 07, 2019

Iana, last time we saw each other was two months ago. How are you today?
I’m fine. Of course I’m a little scared of the impending birth but I am excited because a new life is coming to our family.

So is the birth a big challenge for you?
Yes of course. Not only the birth itself, but also the thoughts that go along with it. I worry about how it will be and how I will get back to my job. I carry many fears and doubts with me.

What kind of fears and doubts, for example?
I wonder how my career will continue and if I will be able to do it all. Nevertheless, the joy of having a child outweighs all my fears.

Iana, I remember seeing you and Marian for the first time. That was just before the birth of your first child. Now you are standing before the birth of your second child and you’re beaming even more today.

Well, back then I was younger and less experienced and I was not very self-confident. Since then I have learned a lot and gained experience which has given me more confidence.

Marian, do you agree?
Yes, definitely. I think that Iana has much more self-confidence today. And what’s important is that she worked very hard for it.

Do you think that your wife has gained mental strength?
Yes she has.

How is that expressed?
Well, she’s more open to people and they can feel what a fantastic person she is, and how modest she has stayed with everything.

I can attest to that too.
Iana, of course, the readers are interested in where you get the power to perform at your best while balancing that with your family life.

Personally, I think that you can only achieve your own peak performance if you are ready to do it in your head.

So you believe in the power of your thoughts?
Yes absolutely. Otherwise, you can not muster the necessary self-discipline and willpower to get where you want to go.

Marian, Iana, how do you handle the moment right before going on stage? How do you prepare yourself to give everything to the audience?
Marian:
Everyone handles the challenges and excitement before a performance differently. When you’re not excited, you’re not aware of the energy you need to use in order to meet those challenges.
Iana:
For me, it’s important that I visualize how I want to dance for the audience. Then during the performance I am able to step out of myself and to sense what the audience wants.

These are almost supernatural powers, right?
No, it’s just the focus and willpower necessary to give my best performance. This is something you always have to keep working on and improving. Marian and I help each other to achieve this and then find the balance.

Iana, can you give an example of how you find your inner-self?
I listen to classical music, close my eyes and imagine that I am lying by the sea. Classical music speaks to me and relaxes me a lot. It takes away my tension and makes me feel alive. Once I am relaxed, I start to think about what I can do to live a healthy life and take care of myself mentally.

What have you gained from your personal mental training?
I understand how to control my thoughts. As an artist, sometimes you are up and sometimes you are down. But it’s so important to use the power of your thoughts and that’s what I do.

Marian:
You have to use the good thoughts. In the past I slipped too much into the negative thoughts. My wife has an incredibly positive mental power. Nevertheless, it is difficult for her to accept herself as she is.
Iana:
I always find something that makes me want to become even more perfect. But I am already satisfied as I am right now.

Marian, what is the meaning of your inner world to you when talking about mental strength?
Marian:
You can go anywhere in your mind and that’s fantastic. If you have your goal already in your mind and you can see the end result, you can then figure out what you need to achieve it.
Iana:
I deal a lot with mental strength. Mental strength requires a lot of mindfulness. When you go on stage, you have to be completely with yourself.

How do you deal with conflicts between each other?
Iana:
We talk more than we used to. That helps a lot.
Marian:
Yes that’s true. In the past, Iana only retired to her shell. Today we can talk things through much better. This is a very good development that we both made. However, I still have to find out for myself what the causes of conflict are in certain situations. But I think that everyone has these experiences in their marriage.
Iana:
You have to talk, so that you understand each other. I like to ask questions. I would much rather find out the answers than torment myself with doubts.

Did the time of pregnancy help you get more insights here?
Yes, time has given me the opportunity to reflect on what makes me different.

What are the most important insights for you?
I can see much more clearly, what I need to do in my family life and work life.

Iana, Marian, thank you very much for the interview and the insights you have given me.
I keep my fingers crossed for you and look forward to seeing you after the birth of your son.

She left without saying goodbye

Iana got on the train to Donetsk. She was happy to finally go back home to Kiev and this time, forever. But her feelings were divided. In fact, a certain sadness came upon her.

The engine of the train started running and the wheels slowly began to turn. Iana laid back in her seat and closed her eyes and as she did this, images started appearing in her mind about the year that had just past. She knew that she was heading towards a new goal in her future.

A guilty feeling would constantly reappear

Iana had left many friends behind. She had a feeling of comfort in the city and really liked the people in Donetsk.

Everything she loved began in this city; her professional education towards becoming a ballerina, her first performances and the first admiration from the audience. But what she regretted the most was not saying goodbye to the ones who supported her and helped to make her dreams come true.

Two special people: Irina Pisareva and Vadim Pisarev. Even today, this thought is heavy on her soul. Irina was there for her when she struggled the most. In particular when Iana didn’t know if she could continue to follow her dream to dance.

Irina gave her food, shelter, nurtured her and gave her the strength through love and compassion which was vital for her to continue.

Vadim Pisarev was a father like figure, teacher and incredible dancer

Vadim was a famous ballet dancer at the time that Iana and her brother started their education. He also held the highly renowned position as Artistic Director of the state Academy of Opera and Ballet in Donetsk, known far beyond the borders of Ukraine.

He then continued creating the international „World Ballet Stars“ festival of which he also became director and he created the Master School of Choreography. Iana and her brother knew how fortunate they were to be under the wings of a true master of the art of ballet.

Donetsk, my new city and my beloved new home

There was nothing Iana would miss in Donetsk, apart from her family in Kiev. She would share an apartment with another balletdancer. Vadim Pisarev was able to acquire this apartment for them, which madeIana very happy because now she would be able to enjoy more freedom.

There wasn’t a nanny anymore who would follow her around everywhere and tell her offfor certain things she would do. That’s how she remembered her time in the dormitory.

This was the time Iana would grow creatively, not only in her ballet education or during her performances on stage in Donetsk but inother areas of life as well.

She also attended a modelling school to become a photography Model. The school was very near to the theatre. The classes provided knowledge on things like how to use the right make up and how to applyit.

She was taught how to walk on a catwalk and everything one would need to know about casting. Once she even received an offer to work with a Parisian modelling agency.

It all seemed so exciting and Vadim Pisarev supported her all the way. He thought it was important for Iana to grow as an artist and to learn about other ways to be creatively active. He even encouraged her to take part in the drama classes at the theatre.

Of course with so many new things to learn, Iana wouldn’t have much time for other things like partying or hanging out withfriends; only very intense work.

To leave Donetsk was not an easy decision but Iana knew it was time to move on in order for her to grow and experience different aspects of her dream. The decision didn’t come over night.

„Should I stayor should I not stay?“

„Should I really leave the city that gave me so much love and support? The ballet teachers who set me on the path to my dream career? “

These questions were constantly running through her mind. She tried to tell herself that this would be her way of giving back for all the good things she had been given but her thoughts were pulling her in different directions and she didn’t know what to do. She didn’t feel comfortable enough to talk to anyone about it so she kept it to herself which would eventually start eating her up inside.

Her brother, Jaroslaw, decided for himself that he would never go back to Donetsk.  Iana decided to follow him to Boston, America to take part in a tour. From there, Jaroslaw received a contract from the balletdirector of Boston to work in his company as a ballet dancer. Iana received the same offer but she had a different idea about what she wanted to do next. Her idea was to go back to Donetsk to train more and improve herself. This was the placewhere she could experiment with her artistry on stage. 

Boston wasn’t the end destination for Ianas‘ brotherJaroslaw. He later went on to dance with Miami Ballet. Miami seemed to be abetter place for him to dance. This decision didn’t seem to have any influence on Iana however, so she flew back to Donetsk and would be there on her own this time, without her brother. This made her miss her family back home in Kiev evenmore. She felt alone and was in need of her parents and all she wanted now was to go back home.

Later, a new love interest emerged for Iana

 He was a Japanese dancer from Kiev. He was already very successful in his career. Iana experienced quite strong feelings for him. He told Iana that he was watching one of her performances in Donetsk and that from that moment on, he was alreadyin love with her.


My new Japanese boyfriend seemed a little obsessed with me

He was fascinated by Iana’s dancing. He felt that it was powerful yet effort less and elegant. She had the ability to emotionally transform the audience with her roles. He would come more frequently to Donetsk to see her. At one point he started to insist for her to move to Kiev with him and become a Ballerina in the Kiev company. Was that what she should do? She didn’t know.

Let’s live and work together in Kiev

Iana was deeply flattered by the attention she got from him. He would have done anything for her. She enjoyed this attention but she also had the desire to be independent and follow her own path.
Iana’s boyfriend asked her if she would go with him to Japan, his home country, in order to participate in an international ballet competition. After a long flight, they arrived in Japan where Iana was introduced to his mother. His mother was incredibly important to him.

He worshiped her like a Goddess. Iana found the Japanese culture and traditions to be very interesting and everyone was so kind to her. It brought her great joy to see the respect they had for the ballet dancers.

Iana was also overjoyed to receive a special prize at the competition. Her experiences in Japan were a big part of her decision to move back to Kiev.

She had a good heart and she never forgot the people by her side

That was the tipping point for her to move back to Kiev. The moment Iana let go, she felt the pain. It hurt deep within her heart because she had left behind good people; good friends. Iana had never been the type of person who would show her inner feelings to others. She either expressed them through dancing or kept them buried inside herself. She had kept all of these emotions hidden because it was important to her to develop her skills, expand her horizons and strive to become the best ballerina she could. The thought of her being with her boyfriend in Kiev and being with her parents again were important factors in her decision to move back to Kiev.

Flashback

„We will shortly be arriving in Kiev.“  Said a voice from the speaker on the train. Iana opened her eyes. Finally, very soon she would see her family again.

„Daddy, could you drive back to Donetsk one more time and explain to Vadim Pisarev why I had to leave without saying goodbye or telling him why?“

Iana begged her father, Anatoli, after her tears upon arrival had dried. Anatoli couldn’t deny the request of his daughter. He drove back to Donetsk and explained to Vadim why Iana had returned to Kiev. He tried his best but he felt a little lost for words. However, Vadim was very understanding. He only wanted the best for Iana.

Iana mentioned at the end of our conversation: „Today, I’m more sure than ever that I had the best dance education in the best school in the world. Therefore I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, Vadim Pisarev and Irina Pisareva, for your love and support throughout all these years. You will always have a place in my heart.“